‘Ghatiya aadmi ka gussa…’: Javed Akhtar once said you can judge a person’s true character by observing their behaviour while they’re angry | Feelings News

He continued, “Shareef aadmi ka gussa kuch aur hota hai, aur ghatiya aadmi ka gussa kisi aur tarah ka hota hai. Uski class kya hai uska gussa batayega. Kyuki uski saari masks, naqaabein gir chuki hain (A good man’s anger is one factor, and a lowly man’s anger is one other. His anger will inform what his class is. As a result of all his masks and veils have fallen).”

With this remark, he steered that whereas time and shared journeys can reveal facets of an individual’s nature, their response in anger will be probably the most telling measure of their actual character.

However, how dependable is anger as a ‘litmus check’ of somebody’s persona or values?

Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells indianexpress.com, “Anger has a manner of peeling again the layers we rigorously put on in on a regular basis life. In these charged seconds, the well mannered self provides option to the instinctive self. However to say it at all times exhibits the ‘true’ character could be unfair. Even a deeply sort particular person can snap and say one thing they remorse, solely to really feel guilt afterwards. That second doesn’t erase their compassion.” 

What issues is just not a single episode however the sample, he says, including, “If anger constantly turns into belittling, cruelty or management, it displays one thing woven into the particular person’s values. An occasional flare exhibits stress; repeated outbursts present character.”

What anger reveals about emotional intelligence and coping abilities

Raj states that when anger takes over, the physique accelerates — heartbeat rises, ideas race, and the same old restraint weakens. That’s when folks say or do issues with out the polish they usually handle. However how one handles this state is the true marker. “Some are in a position to discover the surge, step again, and nonetheless communicate firmly with out tearing the opposite down. That exhibits consciousness and management.” 

Others lash out with insults, threats, or chilly withdrawal. That exhibits anger is driving them slightly than them steering the anger. The emotion itself is common. The best way it’s carried reveals maturity, self-discipline, and respect for others.

Recognizing the distinction between fleeting anger and deeper character traits

The reply lies in aftermath and frequency. A short lived outburst might harm within the second, however it’s adopted by restore–an apology, accountability, a willingness to fix the injury. That anger belongs to the scenario, to not the particular person’s essence, explains the skilled. 

Raj provides, “However when anger turns into a daily weapon–forsaking concern, humiliation, or silence–it displays one thing deeper. In shut relationships, it exhibits up as repeated belittling, dismissed as ‘mood’” At work, it’s the boss who shouts solely at juniors, by no means at equals. Brief-lived anger exhibits vulnerability; continual anger unmasks who the particular person actually is.”